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7 Positive Ways to Overcome Anger

20 Feb Posted by | Be Positive | Comments
7 Positive Ways to Overcome Anger
 

Our brain gives us the ability to compare and contrast. When we compare ourselves with others, it could challenge us to reach greater heights. However, it could also stir up negative emotions such as frustrations, jealousy and anger. For example, if your friend get 100 marks and you get 50, you might strive harder next time and this could be seen as something positive. On the flip side, you could also feel angry and your friend’s success might make you want to “pull him down a peg” instead.

The Dangers of Anger

Anger makes you lose your sense of perspective and result in you making wrong decisions in critical situations.

There was a famous story of a young man whose father promised him a car when he turned 18. When he came back from school on his 18th birthday, instead of seeing a new car, his father gave him a bible. He was so angry that he stormed out of the house and decided not to go back again. He could not forgive his dad for many years. One day, he walked pass his old home and decided to go in and take a look. He realized his dad had passed away by then. He saw the bible on the table and opened it. To his surprised, he saw a cheque for the car between the pages. With it was a note congratulating him on turning 18. His dad hoped that he would be a good person who could follow the teachings of the bible. He was deeply remorseful - The anger at that moment had cost him to regret for the rest of his life.

How to Overcome Anger?

1132892016-12251-4 Many people try to inflict physical or mental damage on the person who makes them angry. This seems to be a logical thing to do - “An eye for an eye”. How many times have we been tempted to take revenge on someone who has made us angry? Others vent their frustration on physical objects. Some patients being treated for anger problems are given a room in which they could smash whatever they like. However, many psychiatrists believe that this practice is harmful because it can be addictive and dangerous if not well controlled.

There are more positive ways to respond to our own anger:

1) Try to understand what the situation is before reacting. Sometimes, you might discover other factors at play behind the scene. For example, you might be angry if someone is late for an appointment. However, if you know that that person was late because he was involved in a car accident, you would react differently.

2) Try putting yourself in someone else’s shoe. If someone annoys you, try and understand where that person is coming from. Some people are very much influenced by their environment and may react angrily simply because it has become a habit or their way of survival. Thinking in this way might make you show more empathy for that person.

3) Try to think something positive about that person or situation. If you dislike someone, try and think of something good about that person. For example, that person might be a loving father, contributed a lot to the society…etc. By thinking of that, it might make you more forgiving. If you are in a bad situation, think of it as an opportunity to grow up in life.

4) Compare yourself to people worst off than you. If you feel that you are not getting what you want, try comparing yourself with people in the third world countries. It might make you feel that you are actually quite fortunate.

5) Accept your fate. In karma, what goes around comes around. If you believe in it, imagine yourself having done many negative things in your past life and accept that it is now time for you to redress the consequences.

6) Try to refocus your emotions elsewhere. Distract yourself by doing other things such as exercising, socializing or listening to music. Very often, doing charity work would make you happier because you are making other people happy.

7) Get out of the situation. This might be the last option although escaping from reality could sometimes work. If you cannot resolve certain conflicts, you might need to just leave until you can think and discuss things more calmly.

There you go, these are the 7 positive tips to address anger. The next time you get angry, try to go through this checklist. Hopefully, you can get yourself out from negativity and be a happier person.

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